Several weeks ago, I was listening to a person talking about a difficult situation in his family. He was at a loss for what to do. I listened… He laid it on the table, “What can I do?” He was beginning to realize that there was nothing he could do to change the person(s) in his family.

I was reminded recently of the following story:

A wise, old Middle Eastern mystic said this about himself. “I was a revolutionary when I was young, and all my prayer to God was: ‘Lord, give me the energy to change the world.’ As I approached middle age and realized that my life was half gone without my changing a single soul, I changed my prayer to: ‘Lord, give me the grace to change all those who come into contact with me. Just my family and friends and I shall be satisfied.’ Now that I am an old man and my days are numbered, I have begun to see how foolish I have been. My one prayer now is: ‘Lord, give me the grace to change myself.’ If I had prayed this right from the start, I would not have wasted my life.”

“Lord, give me the grace to change myself!” Or, as the Serenity Prayer says, “Grant me… the courage to change the things I can…”

The person I was listening to suddenly realized that he could not change his family situation, yet he could change how he dealt with it, how he acted… He bagin to realize that by changing how he acted that he could potentially bring about the greatest change in his family.

Where is your focus?